Find someone to "trade" essays with. (Share your doc with them.) Remember to not only point out places for improvement, but also write down where you are impressed! Make a comment about their awesome verb, stellar explanation, or strong imbedded quote. Then... Introduction: 1. Do they have an attention getter? If not, give some ideas. 2. Is the author and book title mentioned? If not, give suggestions as to where they can add it within the introduction. 3. Is the thesis clear and specific? Can you tell what the theme is and what examples they will use to prove it? Body Paragraphs: 1. Is every topic sentence clear and specific? 2. Change the color of text that you consider SUMMARY to RED. 3. Change the color of the text that you consider to be ANALYSIS or EXPLANATION of how the example proves the thesis in BLUE. -->There should be at least equal parts red and blue... or else more blue than red. 4. Is each quote imbedded into a sentence of the author's own words? --> Does it explain the importance of the quote? Or explain what the quote proves? 5. Does everything in each paragraph connect back to the thesis with thorough explanation? In General: 1. Is it written in present tense? 2. Is it written in 3rd person? (Look for "I"s or "you"s and give suggestions for how the author could turn those into 3rd person.) 3. Look for "no-no" phrases like: in the book, in the chapter, in the end, in the beginning, this quote... 4. Are there strong verbs? (See some examples below...)
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